Relationship Incompatibility Can Be Good and Bad.
Sometimes when we meet new people, they can seem like the perfect match for us, like a friend we can see ourselves having, the partner-in-crime you've been looking for. They're funny, kind, sensitive, relatable and caring.
After a few times of meeting up though, little differences start to show and you might realize that this friend is not the person you thought they were at all.
In most cases, this is simply because everyone is on their best behavior when they meet a new person. They're showing you all their good traits and pleasant attributes. Some people are REALLY good at this. And it's not a bad thing.
The thing is, once people start to get familiar and comfortable with another person, they can lapse into their real personalities. This isn't always bad but it is real. In fact, after you get through some rockiness or awkwardness that comes up, you might find you like each other more once you drop the pretense of always being perfect.
In fact, if you want to get to know and be closer friends with a few people, just keep showing up.
Incompatibility doesn't always mean that you have different goals or hobbies or interests. It could mean you have different objectives in life or different religious beliefs or any number of things.
Being incompatible also doesn't mean your relationship or friendship has to end, but there might be some things that need to be addressed, which is perfect if you come from a place of respect and curiosity.
Mending the Rifts
The level of incompatibility between you and your newly made friend is something only you might feel. Some friends are friends in certain areas, some agree to be tolerant and pleasant to each other no matter the other's beliefs or goals (a very respectable trait to host). Other friends slowly make the change to one or the other person's way of thinking.
Being incompatible on some issues doesn't mean the relationship or friendship needs to end. You may simply need to work on communicating yourself to your friend or newly found relationship or find ways to focus on what you do have in common with each other.
It's worth getting yourself out there and using the mirror of someone else's personality and experiences as in a friendship, to practice showing up as the best version of yourself. You can practice your boundary holding, your stretching into new things, your tolerance, your kindness and your ability to still hold to your deepest beliefs while also being open to and interested in what positive experiences or knowledge any new relationship can bring with it.